How Many Lovers are In Your Bed? (Soul Ties)
Before I begin this teaching,
I declare over you that your ears will be open to hear the truth of Gods word, and that your heart is open to receive healing and freedom from pain and bondage, and, that you will begin to KNOW how very special you are, and that your past will not determine your future.
You truly are “Fearfully and Wonderfully made” Psalm 139:14 and Your KING (Jesus) LOVES YOU beyond my ability to describe His love. Amen!
How Many Lovers Are in YOUR Bed?
I’m sure you are saying, That sounds pretty risqué, and the title truly is:
BUT there are so many women and teen girls that I have met, that are bound by the past, and full of pain and absolutely do not know that to do with the pain, so they mask it.
They mask it with other damaging relationships, jumping from one person to the next, or they start taking drugs, or alcohol, bulimia, anorexia, and the list goes on……..
You see, … You cannot move forward if you cannot and do not resolve the things of the past…. you will just stay in that endless, vicious cycle.. over and over…
A Soul Tie is: the knitting together of two souls.
Your Soul is: Your Mind, Your Will and Your Emotions.
A Tie is: a strong component designed to keep two objects closely linked together.
There are two kinds of Soul Ties:
1. Godly; which brings tremendous blessings
2. UnGodly, which brings tremendous destruction.
Think of your Soul as a Pie. And every-time you tie or connect your-self with someone, you give a piece of that pie away.
And when it’s a good relationship, a Godly Soul Tie, that pie is being constantly renewed, because in a Godly Soul Tie there is a healthy give and take.
But when it’s an Ungodly Soul Tie, that pie is being scattered, because in an Ungodly Soul Tie, there is a constant taking..
John 10:10 says, “A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy.“
2Corinthians…… “For you endure it if a person.assumes control of your souls and makes slaves of you, or devours [your substance, spends your money] and preys upon you, or deceives and takes advantage of you, or is arrogant and puts on airs, or strikes you in the face.”
GODLY SOUL TIES
1 Sam 18:1 After David had finished talking with Saul, Jonathan became one in spirit with David, and he loved him as himself. 1 Sam 18:2 From that day Saul kept David with him and did not let him return to his father’s house 1 Sam 18:3 And Jonathan made a covenant with David because he loved him as himself. NIV
David and Jonathan actually formed a covenant because they loved each other so deeply. Their souls were knit together (tied or joined together) as a relationship of best friends.
The stronger the bonding or soul ties between friends the deeper and more lasting the relationship will be.
You Cry when they cry, and rejoice when they rejoice.
When love between friends is pure and not polluted by any selfish desire, the bond between them is a blessing from God.
That is the kind of love Jonathan and David had, and that is why it was a Godly soul tie.
They truly had a great friendship, and because of the deepness and pureness, their two souls drew strength and encouragement from each other, as well as security and love.
They had pure and giving hearts towards each other.
They even sacrificed for each other… but they didn’t mind, it was an honor.
You should have friends that you learn from, that you encourage and they in turn encourage you; they see great things in you that you don’t see about yourself, they build you up, and you do the same for them.
They protect you and defend you if necessary!
Are the friendships in your life a blessing?
Do they drain you emotionally, or do they add wonderful things to your life.
Jesus speaks of this kind of love in John 15:13 “Greater love hath no man than this that a man lay down his life for his friends.”
Does your present friends bring blessings into you life, or chaos and confusion..
Do you need to change friends?
Or do you need to value and cherish even more the friends God has given you?
UNGODLY SOUL TIES
An ungodly soul tie is when the mind, will and emotions of a person becomes entangled to the point where their thoughts are no longer their own.
The ungodly soul tie occurs when a person is unnaturally affected by the will, the emotions and desires of another person.
Soul ties control your emotions and thinking. You may be able to function and do other things, but when soul tied (glued, knitted together, adhered to) your thoughts are always drawn back to what you are tied to.
Have you ever been studying the Bible, but having a difficult time doing so, because your mind kept wondering off to something in you past, or thinking about someone that hurt you?
You try real hard to stay focused on what you are doing, but before you realize it you have your thoughts go elsewhere.
God wants His people to be free from every bondage, and to put off the delusions, snares and all the hindrances in your soul.
Ungodly soul ties have kept many from the destinies that God has ordained for them.
Many are hiding behind mask, but behind the mask are hurt, discouragement and broken hearts.
The pain is hidden on the outside, but it is very real on the inside. It is time to take off the mask and be free.
You may be able to hide it from people, but nothing can be hidden from Father God.
Ask Yourself these questions:
1. Is there Anything or Anyone that causes you to neglect God.
2. Is there Anything or Anyone that hinders you seeking your destiny.
3. Is there a Tendency to be dominated or manipulated in a relationship
4. Is there a Tendency to be apathetic in a relationship
5. Is there an inability to truly forgive from your heart…
If you answered yes to the majority of those questions, then you probably have a soul tie.
One of the major dangers in soul ties is the fact that you can’t hear God clearly when you have ungodly soul ties.
Luke 10:26-28 “You must love the Lord your God with all your heart and with allyour soul and with all your strength and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself. 28. And Jesus said to him, You have answered correctly; do this, and you will live and enjoy an active, blessed, endless life in the kingdom of God. “
God must be at the top of our hearts.
Deep down in your heart You may truly want to serve God but your relationships
are distracting you and drawing you away from Him.
When you are tender-hearted, or have compassion for people, or you have been
wounded, abused, or feel rejection, and all you want is just to be loved and
accepted, then YOU are a target.
You are the ones most vulnerable to getting caught in the enemies trap.
YOU should be most careful of your choice of friends.
You might say, “Oh, I can help them”.
“I’m doing them some good”, and that may be how it starts out,
BUT the enemy takes the good you want to do, and he turns it back around on you and traps you….then he sits back and laughs at you as you are being lured, enticed and caught in his trap.
When you open yourself up to that person(s) your soul gets attached….
and it’s like you are a magnet. You start taking on their attitudes and their actions.
Maybe you have heard someone say this, or maybe you have said this,
“I didn’t use to do that, or I didn’t use to act that way.”
I have never done those things before”
I have never been to those places before”
Then my question to you would be,
WHO HAVE YOU BEEN HANGING AROUND?
Who have you been associating with?
You even do things that you don’t really like, and before this person came into
your life, you would NEVER even given a thought to doing the things you are now
and yet you know deep down inside it is not the right thing to do….
Yet you go ahead and do it because of that soul tie, that attachment.
They may say, “Let’s go to that party , or let’s try just a taste of that drug or that alcohol…,, oh come on, just one time won’t hurt….
But one time turns into another time until you are trapped.
The enemy is very subtle..
He really makes everything look so innocent…so much fun.. after all, then you will belong, then you will fit in…. You will be accepted..
Once you give in…you have picked up all their spirits…
You want to say you’re saved but you don’t want to make Jesus the Lord of your life…
And because God wasn’t at the Center of your heart and you stopped long enough to entertain those invitations…
You couldn’t hear Gods voice to be guided by Him… He will guide you in all truth… not lead you into traps..
Get this one point very clearly…
God Leads…the enemy pushes!!!
SOUL TIES ARE REAL…..
2 Corinthians 6:13 says in the KJV “Do Not Be Unequally yoked together with unbelievers”,
the Message Bible says,
“Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war.
Is light best friends with dark?
Does Christ go strolling with the Devil?
Do trust and mistrust hold hands?
Who would even think of setting up pagan idols in God’s holy Temple?”
But that is exactly what we are, each of us a temple in whom God lives.
Ask yourself these questions about your relationships:
1. Is this person a compromising person?
2. Is it their way or no way?
3. Are they self-centered?
4. Do they have a giving spirit or do they always want to take?
5. Are they kind, gentle and above all loving?
6. No Matter their age, How do they treat their parents?
7. Are they born again and walking with Jesus? If so, You will see the fruit of that
commitment, it will not be in word only.
8. Are they controlling or manipulative?
IF SO, BEWARE… IT’S A TRAP!
The dominion a soul tie gives a man over his lover is often so binding that he can insult and mistreat her but she seems helplessly enslaved to him. She starts to believe that she can’t possibly get free and that she doesn’t deserve anything better than this abuse.
Many women will tolerate all kinds of abuse and they won’t understand why: They end up hating themselves, because they don’t understand about soul ties. Whenever you hate yourself it is hard to give real love or receive real love.
God says in Rom 8:15 For ye have not received the spirit of bondage that brings you to fear;
The first mention of a “soul tie” is found in Genesis:
Genesis 2:21-25 (The Message)
21-22 GOD put the Man into a deep sleep. As he slept he removed one of his ribs and replaced it with flesh. GOD then used the rib that he had taken from the Man
to make Woman and presented her to the Man. The Man said, “Finally! Bone of my bone, flesh of my flesh! Name her Woman for she was made from Man.”
Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and embraces his wife. They become one flesh.
This is the famous “Leave and Cleave” passage concerning marriage. From thevery beginning God’s intention has been that the man and woman’s soul ties with
their parents should be broken before their marriage.
WHY IS THAT?
Because few things are as destructive to a marriage as when one partner or another
is still emotionally tied, and often as a result, manipulated and controlled. Then the spouse feels very unloved, neglected and feels they take second place in their spouse’s heart.
This is the first example of an admonition from God to break a soul tie.
Eph 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be
joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
LEAVE AND CLEAVE!
Sexual Soul Ties
Our sexuality is a gift from God!
Sexual soul ties form when there is ANY sexual contact with anyone else.
It’s like an umbilical cord…… What’s in one person is transferred to the other person…The two become one.
Hebrews 13:4. “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. “
Since the sexual union of marriage ties two souls as one, what do you think happens if a person commits fornication as an unmarried person, or adultery with another person outside of the marriage?
Your soul becomes mysteriously knit and tied to the other person also. They cleaved together just as in marriage.
The soul ties formed through illicit sexual involvement can be as strong and binding as those formed through the marriage covenant.
How Many past Lovers Do you or your spouse bring into your marriage bed?
According to Matthew 5:28, “But I say to you that everyone who so much as looks ata woman with evil desire for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart.“……..
So many people think that Viewing pornography isn’t wrong, the enemy has created this false sense of, it’s ok, it isn’t a real person BUT it is not ok, you are creating a soul tie.
Your mind is involved, your emotions, and your will made the choice to view it.
People that have formed soul ties with many people through fornication and promiscuity, their souls have become fragmented and scattered among all their sexual partners.
If you are unable to give yourself fully to your spouse it is because your thoughts and emotions are being continually drawn back to past lovers.
For example: If a woman has sexual relations with several men, her spirit and soul seek out every one of them. Her spirit is scattered and torn apart.
God’s plan and design for a husband is that he is to protect, bless, nurture and provide for that woman. So Guys who have been divorced and remarried, they still seem to want to protect or take care of their ex-wife?
People that have been promiscuous, their souls are not only drawn to all their former lovers, but when they marry they often have sexual and communication problems with their mates. They are unable to be sexually satisfied by their marriage partner because they suffer from a scattered soul and cannot share themselves fully with their mate. They often seek satisfaction, not only with multiple partners, but also through experimentation with bizarre forms of sex that may eventually lead to perversion.
Here is A COUPLE OF Examples of UnGodly Sexual Soul Ties told in the BIBLE .
Genesis 34:2 “And when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite, prince of the country, saw Dinah, he took her, and lay with her, and defiled her.”
He lusted after her, to the point HE couldn’t control the fire within him any longer and then he raped her.
Here is another story that is a perfect example of how the enemy starts out his trap and once in his trap you are the one who loses.
2 Samuel 13 “Absalom, David’s son, had a sister who was very attractive. Her name was Tamar.
Amnon, also David’s son, was in love with her. Amnon was obsessed with his
sister Tamar to the point of making himself sick over her. She was a virgin, so he
couldn’t see how he could get his hands on her. Amnon had a good friend, Jonadab,
the son of David’s brother Shimeah. Jonadab was exceptionally streetwise. He said
to Amnon, “Why are you moping around like this, day after day—you, the son of
Tell me what’s eating at you.” “In a word, Tamar,” said Amnon. “My brother Absalom’s sister. I’m in love with her.”
5 “Here’s what you do,” said Jonadab. “Go to bed and pretend you’re sick. When your father comes to visit you, say, ‘Have my sister Tamar come and prepare some supper for me here where I can watch her and she can feed me.'”
6 So Amnon took to his bed and acted sick. When the king came to visit, Amnon said, “Would you do me a favor? Have my sister Tamar come and make some nourishing dumplings here where I can watch her and be fed by her.”
7 David sent word to Tamar who was home at the time: “Go to the house of your brother Amnon and prepare a meal for him.”
8-9 So Tamar went to her brother Amnon’s house. She took dough, kneaded it,
formed it into dumplings, and cooked them while he watched from his bed. Butwhen she took the cooking pot and served him, he wouldn’t eat.
9-11 Amnon said, “Clear everyone out of the house,” and they all cleared out. Then he said to Tamar, “Bring the food into my bedroom, where we can eat in privacy.” She took the nourishing dumplings she had prepared and brought them toher brother Amnon in his bedroom. But when she got ready to feed him, he grabbed her and said, “Come to bed with me, sister!”
12-13 “No, brother!” she said, “Don’t hurt me! This kind of thing isn’t done in Israel! Don’t do this terrible thing! Where could I ever show my face? And you–you’ll be out on the street in disgrace. Oh, please! Speak to the king—he’ll let you marry me.”
14 But he wouldn’t listen. Being much stronger than she, he raped her.
15 No sooner had Amnon raped her than he hated her—an immense hatred. The hatred that he felt for her was greater than the love he’d had for her. “Get up,” he said, “and get out!”
16-18 “Oh no, brother,” she said. “Please! This is an even worse evil than what you just did to me!”
But he wouldn’t listen to her. He called for his valet. “Get rid of this woman. Get her out of my sight! And lock the door after her.” The valet threw her out and locked the door behind her.
18-19 She was wearing a long-sleeved gown. (That’s how virgin princesses used to dress from early adolescence on.) Tamar poured ashes on her head, then she ripped the long-sleeved gown, held her head in her hands, and walked away, sobbing as she went.”
You see ladies, just as in this story, this is how the process begins, when the enemy sets a trap for you. Once the guy spots you, You look good to him, the lust starts, Lust not love, then the sweet talk starts, the fun times
together, the little gifts, the laughs…. Look Out!
You are being set up, you are being lured into his trap…
Once he gets what he wants…your valuable treasure, your virginity that you have protected… or once a child is conceived…
Then he hates you….. just like with Amnon and Tamar…
The above scriptures give an illustration of how fornication and immorality form
When you want a boyfriend, your knight in shining armor,so much that it consumes all your thoughts, and all you desire to listen to is love songs, and watch love movies, that is causing that desire to be reinforced in you
and God has no place in your heart. Am I saying a pure love song and a good pure love story is wrong…absolutely not… Its when it is your focus, your priority is out of balance….
Proverbs 4:23 says, “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.“
Is it worth having just any relationship, just to go through the pain you have endured?
Every-time you end it, and then you start looking for another guy, and on and on.. and every-time you have another relationship and it ends, then you are putting another layer of pain in your heart.
Whatever you think about, that’s who you are and what you want!
Here are some common excuses that people use to justify what they are doing, but Please do not fall in the trap of deception.
1. Oh, he’s so cute. He’s not saved but I can change him… I will lead him to the
I’ve heard this my whole life….
LOOK OUT BEWARE YOU ARE SETTING YOURSELF UP TO BE DECEIVED!!
There has to be a separation… How pure do you want to be?
You hear, Jesus fellowshipped with the world… Jesus ministered to the world.. That’s a BIG difference!
AND He KNEW Who He Was!
When you start associating with the world YOU BETTER KNOW Who you are in Christ.
and Greater is He that Is In Me than He that Is in the World, because before you know it you will
be yanked into the world… You have to draw the line..set your standards and let GOD CHOOSE Your associations!
Some of the Excuses that people use to justify their fleshly desires and have that momentary satisfaction is:
1: We are in love and it won’t hurt anything because we are going to be married someday.
2: He said it would be ok if we did this just this once, and we will wait until we are married to do it again.
4: I won’t think badly of you, we are meant to be together. What will one time matter?
5: God won’t mind because we are going to get married.
Or for those of you who have been married, The enemy says,
6. Oh, it doesn’t matter, I use to be married, and I need this. I need to be
satisfied. Just one time is ok… 1 time becomes 2 and on and on! You’re trapped!
Lust and sin are gratifying for the moment, It may seem fun and good right now
because the word of God even says, Hebrews 11:25…“There’s pleasure in sin for a season….
but when that season is up…
there is shame, guilt, humiliation, and even anger towards God, deep sorrow, with regrets tormenting, haunting memories.
When we are involved in those things there is denial. We tell ourselves that there is nothing in our past to deal with and we don’t need to change.
Years of sin weakens a persons character.
We need to understand the seriousness in these soul ties.
Paul warns us in 1 Cor 6:18 “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man
commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body.”
Flee means Run like your coat-tail is on fire!
BUT GOD LONGS TO SET YOU FREE AND MAKE YOU WHOLE…
Maybe you’re a Christian lady and something just seems to be blocking you from
walking in fullness with God or from having that intimacy with your mate because
of the soul ties from the past….
or maybe you’re a teenager who has been rebellious or caught in that trap,… and has lost her virginity..
or maybe YOU were the one who was raped and for some reason that you can’t seem to explain, you feel this connection to the rapist…. You feel tied…
I want you to know that you CAN BE SET FREE from this bondage, this tie!
Pray this Prayer and believe that God has brought healing to you.
“Lord I confess I have practiced (fornication, adultery or homosexuality). I choose to repent for my sinful practices and ask that you break this sin with the power of your cross and cover my sin with Your Blood.
I confess all my ungodly spirit, soul, and body ties as sin. I thank you for forgiving me and cleansing me!
In Jesus name, I ask you to loose me from all soul ties from all past sexual partners and ungodly relationships.
In Jesus name, please uproot all the tentacles of sexual bondage, of all emotional longings and all dependencies, and enslaving thoughts.
I bind, renounce, and resist any evil spirits that have reinforced those soul ties or may have been transferred between me through any evil associations.
Lord, I confess that I have feelings of guilt and shame, I take my feelings of guilt and shame arising from this relationship and I bring them to your cross.
In Jesus name I break these feelings off me.
Please cleanse my soul and help me to forget all illicit unions so that I am free to give my soul to you with my whole heart, and to my spouse, or to my future spouse. Father, I receive your forgiveness. I believe I am totally forgiven.
Now I want to pray a Prayer of Restoration and Blessing over you.
“By the authority of the name of Jesus Christ, I break the power of any and all covenants, contracts, or word dedications made over her. Father, in Jesus mighty name, I ask you to shut any doorways of demonic access opened into her life by ungodly soul ties, or any sort of sexual sin. I ask you to seal those doorways
FOREVER with the blood of the Lamb, shed for us on the cross of Calvary.
I break the power of guilt and shame that has caused her to hold her head down, and has held her captive because of what she has done, or what has been done to her.
I Bless her with peace, with the revelation of your WORD, with the ability and the desire to hear your voice and to hear it clearly. I bless her with the strength and the desire to obey your voice. I Bless her with the precious restoration of purity and the wisdom and strength to choose godly relationships from this day forth.
Father, I Thank you that the enemy has no stronghold over her from this day forth, because he has been exposed for who he is, a thief and a liar.
I Thank you that in the name of Jesus, she has right now forgiven herself just as YOU have forgiven her, and that she walks free from condemnation… for whom the Son has set free is free indeed!!! “
Praise the Lord! REJOICE, and Praise Him with a grateful heart .
He HAS heard the cry of your heart and He has seen every painful tears you have cried…. He loves you beyond description…
He has lightened your heavy burden today, Accept it by faith…. He has set you free!
Now Blessed Daughter of God, I pray you will be determined, “My life will be a blessing to the Lord.
I love you, and I rejoice with you that God has forgiven you, washed you clean, and set you free.
Praise The Lord!
CONTACT US and share your testimony or request.